Socialpunk

The other day I was approached through an email ( I never thought anyone would actually use my link) about doing a Blog Tour for a fellow blogger/writer named Monica Leonelle and I excitedly agreed to work with her on the opportunity.This is my first of two blog posts about her first of three books, the first of which is called Socialpunk. Enjoy!

After playing God for six years with the world he created, he couldn’t control any of his subjects, none at all. Over the years, he had watched them evolve and become the sum of their own choices rather than the sum of his; and for that, he regretted ever giving them life.

A small, blinking red light from just inside his eyelid reminded him of the news they sent him earlier that morning. The company had cancelled his funding and would shut down his project within three months. According to them, the project cost too much and took up too much space, and the inconclusive results couldn’t be published reputably, now or in the future.

Six years of his work, tens of thousands of lives at stake—and he could do nothing to save any of it. He bowed his head, letting his chin rest on the rim of his breakfast smoothie. The smoothie reeked of powder—crushed pills—but he supposed he had better get used to it. He wouldn’t be able to afford the luxury of real food after they canned him.

He closed his eyes and called up the camera view of one of his favorites, number 3281. She fascinated him; he couldn’t deny it. When he had designed her, her pre-teen rebelliousness lit fire in her eyes. A survivor, he’d thought. He’d meant for her to have it all—to grow up, to get married to the love of her life, and to have a beautiful family of her own someday.

But he had only given her sadness so far. Instead of creating a strict father, he had given her an abusive one. Instead of creating a loving boyfriend, he had given her a friend who could never love her. And instead of creating a strong, proud mother, he had given her a meek one, who watched the whole thing unfold and did nothing about it.

He looked at his last and final creation sitting in the chair across from him—his own son, not awakened yet. The law forbade him to have any children of his own, so this boy would substitute.

But he had done the unthinkable with this creation—he had bestowed on it his own thoughts, emotions, and decision-making processes. He’d given the boy his own mind, his own physical characteristics, his own wants and desires.

He had never done so with any of the others because of the dangers of investing too heavily in any one of his subjects. But who could he kid? He had not stayed objective thus far, watching some of his subjects more closely than others, wishing for the happiness of some at the expense of others. He had become an abomination, a monster of his own doing, who had created subjects only to watch them suffer.

Tumblr is amazing.

Do it!!! 

"Nebraska, Nebraska, I love you."

So far my first actual college Spring Break has been pretty amazing, despite the trouble we had getting here, and it's only day three.  So far my boyfriend, his sister and I have adventured to Red Mango, a cute little frozen yogurt and smoothie joint and to a  sweet factory, called Rocket Fizz, which pretty much contains all of my worldly passions sans books in one quaint building.

Sadly though, our Spring Break did not start off as care free and wonderful as it has been. The boyfriend and I were Nebraska bound and just outside of the town our school is in when my car started to get this weird smell, and since our school's town is full of factories that may have been expelling the putrid smell, it wasn't. We looked out my back window and saw a massive amount of exhaust coming out of my car, so we went to get some oil in it. We were too late, we pulled over to the side of the road and had to make at least 4 calls a piece to find someone to tell us what may be wrong with it and to see if they could come get us. We finally got someone to come get us and to take us back to school for the night and wait for morning to call a tow truck.

The next morning we called a tow truck and finally got my car back on campus, we got out our bags and headed to Nebraska with the bf's dad and sister. I don't want this week to end, but I know that we have to go back to real life, and school, but it's days away so I'm not entirely worried right now. I just hope that my car will be able to be fixed with the little money I do have and that my financial woes will get better over the summer.  Til then I'm just going to enjoy the chirping of the birds, the warmth of the sun on my face and the smell of home cooked meals.

What are you doing for your Spring Break??

xoxo

So, I've been dumped.

It seems that a so-called friend of mine, who shall remain nameless, even though I've written about this certain individual before, and with high praise I might add, has deleted me from Facebook.

Yes, it's Facebook and I have a ton of other friend's that are perfect for the replacement of this former friend, but I have an issue with people sometimes. I always want answers as to why they've done what they've done, not just to me, but to others as well and for this person in particular I am chomping at the bit for even a slice of communication. But it seems that my college experience may be "changing me" and their Bible thumping bigot of a fiance does not entirely embrace the world and all of it's glorious changes that are happening every day. As I see it that's their problem, I'll be the one that's educated and I'll be a half of  a power couple making bank (hopefully) and they'll be busy popping out babies left and right like it's going out of style.

I'm sorry but this unfortunate loss of an already lost friend is not really helping my stress levels, it's almost 4 a.m. and I have a class at 9 in the morning tomorrow and I'm blogging about spilled milk essentially. It's the week before Spring fucking Break, why can't I just have a little bit of solitude? Just a dash, a pinch if you will. So in an effort to cool my own jets about this abrupt departure I've taken to posting a poll of sorts on my Facebook wall asking my friend's who is getting educated, who has been educated, and who has a job in a field they enjoy that getting a degree helped them to get. To prove to myself and They Who Shall Not Be Named that in the end things will probably be better for me.


Tonight, I hate Facebook a little bit more.

Tomorrow is another day, just gotta breathe through today I guess.


I've said my peace.

Observations from the outside looking in.

Today, this week has been a long and grueling one. 

My stress levels are about as up and down as my circadian rhythm. 

I’ve changed my major (for the second and hopefully last time).

I really, REALLY despise math. I see no point in it right now and how it will help me in my major, other than basic things. I would love to be done with it now. 

Espresso and chocolate have become two major players in my diet.

 I need more art in my life, including the chance to make it and indulge myself completely in it. I don’t care as long as it’s tangible. 

Freshman year really is the most stressful, I think I’ve gained my “freshman 15” and then some in the past month since the semester has started. 

I want to win the lottery and pay off school and save some for future semesters, and then help my mom out a bit. 

I want to get lost in a beautiful book. 

I need a hug. 

I know that things in my life will get better, but these rough days are just the exchange I get for having some pretty awesome days at the beginning of this week. And I’m okay with that. 

Yoga, I should start doing that.

xoxo 

sweet, simple relief

I've had a better day today. The stress has seems to be mostly slept away and while I'm still haunted by some of the things that I need to actually be worrying about I did the closest thing to cost effective therapy that I could do.

I found my boyfriend, who has also been under a lot of stress lately too, and we just held each other.

Sometimes I just want to run off and join the circus.

Someone once told me that it's better to get your thoughts out on paper than to keep them bottled inside and on the verge of spilling over and becoming an even bigger mess than they started out with. So here goes.

                         .............................................................................................

Right now there is so much on my mind that I am having trouble comprehending it all. So what's a girl to do?

Why eat chocolate and watch chick flicks of course, and maybe even bond over media and school and general awesomeness to semi-strangers on Twitter..ya know, typical Wednesday afternoon happenings.

• The pressure of yearbook is starting to get to me; I like the whole premise of the class, but I feel like I threw myself to the starving lions.
• My work schedule is interesting, while I'm not complaining about the fact that I have a job. It's more like the fact that my class schedule was decided before I got the job so my sleep schedule has been significantly altered so in between classes,homework and interviewing people and attempting social time I feel like I am mildly failing at life. 
• My anxiety probably needs to be treated soon. 

I'm debating between changing my majors again. I'm currently a Convergent Media and PR major right now, but after a random and all together amazing discussion with one of my English professors I am highly considering changing one of my majors to Technical Communications so that I can thread the two together and make them both work for me in their own fantastic ways.

I have a lot of thinking to do and I'm once again doing what I do best and over-analyzing the hell out of all of these situations even though I know that in the end everything will most likely turn out for the better, at least I'm hoping so anyways.

xoxo

What are some of  your coping methods when life starts to get a little rough around the edges?


Picture source: Google)