Crossing one finish line just in time to start another race.

My first full year as a college student comes to a bitter sweet end in a week and a half. I'm at a total loss for words  as for how to describe my love and appreciation for my new friend's that I've met here. They really have become like a second family. I've been fortunate enough to have the opportunity to work on projects online and on campus that are conducive to my major.  Last month (April) my RHD and several other people in my residence hall decided to do another production of The Vagina Monologues, and since I've never seen the show and my curiosity, got the best of me. So I signed up to help with the publicity and advertising for the event, and holy crap on a stick! not only was the show phenomenal, but the real stories and the women of my school that were performing them were beyond amazing.
This year I've also taken bold and enlightening class choices in a major effort to better my writing skills and all that effort will be paying off next year when I'll be the assistant editor for my school's yearbook!! So not only will my writing be featured and published in an award winning yearbook next year for this year's book, but I also get as many copies of the book as I want. I intend on grabbing at least a handful and marking all of my stories and sending them to several family members to show them my progress thus far in school. Another plus to being an editor next semester is that I get to go to Chicago with the rest of the editor's, which is going to be awesome because  I've never been on an airplane before and I've never traveled any farther than Iowa and Nebraska. My name is Nicole and I'm a traveling n00b!

Now that it's nearly finals week and things around school are becoming even more hectic and deadlines are rearing their ugly heads I'm ready for the summer and next semester's round of classes to come along. During the summer  I am going to hopefully be working on campus and when I'm not working I plan to read, write, do yoga and make some money. I really need to get me back in order. This semester has helped and hurt it, but I'll be okay. Things usually turn out better for those with faith in something than those that don't anyways.

How has your year gone? How are you hoping your summer goes?

xoxo

A little introspection and a cracked shell

All my life I've worn a rock hard shell of stubbornness and courage, the proverbial "brave face" but that shell has collected some dents and cracks over the years. The first 14 years of my life were split between hospitals and a little bit of my mom and dad's houses. When I was born I wasn't supposed to even make it more than 10 hours due to a severe heart condition.

It's been a year since my dad has passed and I don't think that I have ever fully grieved, I don't know if it's because I just haven't had the time, the energy or what exactly but I think that as the days pass and things start to get crazier I don't think it will ever get done. In the past year since he's been gone I have noticed that I have been a little testier and angrier than normal. I've never been much of an angry person to begin with but now it's been starting to get out of hand. I mean I'm not like ripping people's faces off if they give me attitude but when your deemed the "the goody goody" throughout middle school and high school  I have to let the "bitch" out of me.

I really hate how much I have been letting some external things get to me lately, from snarky customers to one of my brother's semi "holier than thou" attitude just because he plays sports and is a 12 year old man whore in training, yes I know that I really shouldn't let any of this get to me but it's hard for me not to sometimes, I tend to take some things to heart every now and then. It's a blessing and a curse some times...
Thankfully it's finally June and August will be here before I know it and I can begin a new (much awaited) chapter in my life and get away from the slight craziness that is my family.

I really miss my daddy you guys.

What do you do when you really miss someone that's not physically around anymore?

xoxo